"The Sound"

Yall!! (Yes, I meant yall. That's the AL coming out. *smiles*) I listened to Mary Mary's new Cd, "The Sound" on Rhapsody. OMG! Mary Mary made their mark as being a Gospel duo with a more secular sound. They incorporated R&B, Jazz, Hip Hop, and even swing into their music.

This latest album continues in that tradition. The album has a sound all its own. The sound ranges from 50s r&b to present day Hip Hop. They even got David Banner on "Superfriend." One standout track is "God in Me" featuring Kierra "Kiki" Sheard. Wow. The flow on the verses sounds extremely similar to The Dream's flow on "I Love Your Girl". They even have the Zapp/T-pain voice thingy going on. You know I liked that... hehe...

Then you have tracks like "Dirt" with an extremely smooth, serene sound reminiscent of smooth soul from the 70s. "It Will All Be Worth It" is the last track on the album and brings everything back home. This track sounds more traditional than the rest of the songs on the album; they belt out and testify that its all worth it and that everything will be all right. And I promise I heard Rance Allen on there. You know him! The guy from the song, "Something about the name Jesus" with Kirk Franklin...

All in all, if you're looking for Gospel music with the classic mass choir singing in the background, this album is NOT for you. If you are progressive, love a good beat, and like to move all the while praising our Lord, then this is definitely the album for you.

Meditate On It

Let your praise outweigh your asking.

This was the topic of my Devotional this morning. Yes, we are to go to God in prayer. Yes, we have not because we ask not. But let your praise OUTWEIGH your asking. If you are constantly asking God to do things for you, chances are you aren't giving Him praise that lets Him know that you trust that He will indeed do it. So, praise God because you know without a doubt that He can and will answer your prayers.

He will supply.

Romans 4:20 - "He staggered not at the promise of God through unbelief; but was strong in faith, giving glory to God;"

Friday Ramblings

• I found out last night that it takes money to make money.


• The enemy isn't playing games. He is on his grind. I confessed some things to God. And no lie, two days later, I was a hot mess. The exact opposite was happening.


• Solve this equation: "I like you" + "You like me"= ?
  a. we like one another so are willing to work through anything
  b. we should just be stubborn and prideful and not open up
  c. let's just do the dang thing and be together
  d. yeah, I like you, but it's just not enough


• I'm so feeling my hair right about now. It is just growing and the curls are just popping


• Why do people feel like they have to prove their level of spirituality? I don't have to quote Bible versus or speak in church vernacular to prove myself to anyone. The way I live my life speaks volumes. That urks me. It makes me want to end the conversation when people do that. Anyone can quote the Bible or a gospel song. Even Satan knows the Word. Come on now....


• Why do we delete numbers from our phones knowing that we're gonna find a way to get that number again and text/call the person?


• Why did I talk to my ex for a good minute yesterday.... but not about us! He has become like a big brother/best friend to me. That's crazy, huh?


• I see that you take my kindness for a weakness, my compassion for meekness, and my quietness for naiveness.


• If you want me to open up, attacking me isn't the way to do it. You have to give a little to get a little.


• On the way to work this morning I heard Make Me A Believer by Luther and Fortunate by Maxwell. Man... Those two songs make me......But the video to Fortunate! lol! It still creeps me out. I don't get it... And why at the end do we only see that woman's feet in the bathroom? It's just creepy....

My Refuge

Art by Fred Matthews

Today is one of those days when I wish I had a man. I'm feeling extremely emotional, tired, frustrated, and vulnerable. All I want to do is crawl in my imaginary boyfriend's arms, cry, and feel all of the craziness lift away. He would hug me tightly and let me know that everything is going to be OK. He would kiss my forehead and then each tear that fell from my eye. He would tell me how beautiful I am to him and how much he loves me. I would look up at him and tell him that I love him too. Then we'd both smile, knowing that no matter how hectic the world got, we could find refuge in one another's arms.

But that is a dream. And as I type this, I hear the Lord saying that He wants to be my refuge. He wants to take away the pain.

But I ain't gonna lie.

It's hard.

Quotes of the Day

To get something you never had, you have to do
something you never did.

When God takes something from your grasp, He's not
punishing you, but merely opening your hands to receive something better.

Concentrate on this sentence: The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.

Photo Op!

I moved into my apartment on Saturday!! WOO HOO!!! It is an absolutely beautiful place. The whole thing is awesome- full fledged gym, movie theatre, business center, in-door basketball court, swimming pool & jacuzzi..... That place is bad! But I miss home! :( And I really feel like this is taking my faith and trust in God to a whole other level. I've never had to lean on Him the way I do now. So, we shall see....

Two guys from church and another one of my guy friends helped me moved in. They got to my place by 9 and had everything out the door by 10:30. We were finished with everything around 1. Not bad, huh? Anywho...

This picture was taken Sunday night. My Joi Joi and I were supposed to be brainstorming ideas for a production that we're working on, but we decided to take pics instead. That's me sitting on our bump-out in the living room.

That's me and my roomie. We look a hot mess.. so disregard our appearance. But we're still ALL THAT! So don't hate! hehe...Kim was unpacking and I was making fried tortillas and tomato soup. Yum! Isn't my Kimmie beautiful?? =)

This is me and JM "working" on the production ideas that were supposed to be submitted 7 hours earlier. Oops! Isn't my JM beautiful?? =)

Meet Louise and Lupe. I've had Louise since I was three. And yes, they moved in with me. I'm never giving them away!! LOL! I love Cabbage Patch Kids.

And that's it! Randomness at its finest.

Ne-Yo....Pleasantly Surprised

Oh, Ne-Yo. I admit that I was going to sleep on your album. I wasn't even going to give it a second look. But today, I took a chance and listened. And I am highly pleased. It sounds like nothing that is out right now, which is a good thing. It's not typical R&B. It's got a European, Michael Jackson circa Off the Wall, classic, Ne-Yo sound. I like it. Ne-Yoism. Yeah, that's what I'll call it. I get tired of hearing the same ol' stuff. But this is refreshing.

Closer sounds like something that you hear when you walk in Express. They always have that euro-beat music playing all loud, drowning out any and all thoughts.

I have to listen to it again to get a real feel for it. But upon first listen of the album, it's something that I can listen to all the way through. Way to go Ne-Yo!!!

"So You Can Cry" is one of my off the top favorites. He said, "I'll ask the sun to shine away from you today so you can cry." Ne-Yo!!!! That is hot right there. His voice was so beautiful on that track. He made my face squinch up like something smelled bad. lol! That's my, "Um! That sounds good" face.

Ok. That's my 1.5 cents. Going back to work now...

OK... I had to come back and add this: I'll be your boyfriend till this song goes off??? Really??? What foolery is that? *shakes head* I still like the album though.

But I Can't Hear You

I walk into work today and immediately smell syrup. So, I ask two of my co-worker buddies if they smell syrup. They both reply that its the coffee that I smell. Ok. So, i sit at my desk and began my morning ritual. But I still smell syrup!!! So I ask again if anyone had some pancakes, some waffles, some something??? The smell was making me hungry. So, I got up and went to McDonald's and got me some hotcakes. Not bad for 2 dollars. I thought maybe the smell would go away if I actually succumbed to the craving. Nope, I still smell it.

Anywho... on my way to McDonald's I catch Yolanda Adam's Points of Power. They were talking about being in fellowship with God and trusting in Him. I promise you that if you ask God for something, He will give it to you or show you what you need to do in order to get it.

I know that God is real. I know that He is with me. But sometimes, I feel alone. I don't hear Him like I should. I don't trust Him like I should. If I did, I wouldn't get into these situations where I worry and doubt. Think about it. If you had 100% ultimate trust and faith in knowing that your Father is almighty and all powerful and that He has promised to never leave you, you would never worry about a thing.

So, as they were talking, it dawned on me that in order to have complete trust, you have to know the Word of God. How can you trust Him when you know none of His promises? How can you trust someone that you know nothing about? That is an area that I lack in. Yes, I'm doing better now. That's because I realized that in those moments of worry, fear, or doubt that I must confess the word out loud. Yolanda Adams said that sometimes you have to just say the Word over and over again. Life and death lies in the power of the tongue.

God reveals himself to you through His word. It's right there. We all have the power to tap into His promises. We all have the power to have a wonderful relationship with Him- one in which He talks to us and guides us. But that can't happen without some work on our part.

I've been praying for a better relationship. I've been asking God to teach me how to listen to Him. Teach me how to hear You and without a shadow of a doubt know that it is You. Since I've prayed that prayer, God has shown me that I have to read His Word. I have to set out time for Him. I need to confess it and believe it. I need to pray to Him and also simply talk to Him. I also have to praise Him, not just at church. But at home, in my car, even at my desk.

Bottom line: Ask and you definitely will receive. Read the word. Get to know God for yourself.

No Looking Back

Philippians 3:13-14

Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do,
forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things
which are before,
I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling
of God in Christ Jesus.

What's your stronghold? What thing has you in bondage? It may not be every day of your life. But what situation, addiction, thought, mentality, or person causes you to struggle? What in your life can't you seem to get over or let go of? What is holding you back from being who God has called you to be? These are all strongholds.

In the dictionary, a stronghold is defined as, "a fortified place or a fortress". In the old testament, a stronghold was a fortified place used as a means of protection. In the new testament, a stronghold is defined as, "arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God." 2 Corinthians 10:3-5

Satan starts working on building strongholds early on in our lives. He is a crafty little pesk. He also takes his time. Think about the strongholds in your life. Chances are, the root of the problem began years ago. You may not be able to trust because of something someone did to you 10 years ago. You may be addicted to something because of one encounter that you had years ago. Your way of thinking, your thought process, may be a little off because of something that happened in your childhood or simply because of the way you were brought up.

These things take root in our lives and prevent us from moving forward. God can't use us the way He wants to if we have junk blocking our flow.

My stronghold was my mind. There are things that happened to me and situations that I went through that had completely altered the way I thought about myself and my world. I was seeing the world through false lenses. And because I saw the world the way that I wanted to see the world, because I saw myself the way I wanted to see myself, it kept me from realizing who I truly am.

I would find myself in situations that weren't right. And instead of just dealing with it the right way and going to God, I would break my neck trying to make it go my way- because that's the way I saw things. I would worry myself to death! God was telling me, "my child, let go." But I would hang on to the situation with all my might- kicking, screaming, crying- continuing to dig myself into a deeper mental hole. My mind was always all over the place. I let people easily get to me. I didn't have a sense of who I was. And the devil played off of that- for years.

I tried to do the unspeakable a few years back. And its because I didn't know who I was. My mind was messed up. Satan had it out for me. And lately, I found myself back in the same situations, having the same thoughts, feeling the same way.

But let me tell you, because my God is an awesome God, He heard my cry. He saw me when I got down on my knees in full submission to Him. He felt me lay all of my issues out in front of Him. And He gently lifted me up and renewed my mind. God took situations that were meant for my bad, even those that I meant for evil, and worked it out for my good.

You have to recognize the strongholds in your life, present them to God, tell Him that you are a mess and you don't want to be this way. And I guarantee that He will make a way. He will pull you out of whatever it is that is holding you in bondage. You just have to believe.

And once he does it, you CAN'T LOOK BACK. There is no looking back.

Damita Haddon has a song out called, "No Looking Back." She says:

I am leaving this place now
Letting go of all my fears
Saying goodbye to the memories I hold dear
I can finally breathe again
It's a new day, farewell past
As I close this chapter
I say free at last

I made up my mind, there's no turning back
The past is behind me, there's no looking back
I'm looking forward, not behind
I made a decision to give You my life
And there's no looking back.....

That's real right there. Recognize the crap in your life- the things that you know aren't right, the things that are grieving your spirit, the things that you can't shake- and ask God to release you. Ask God to examine you and wash you anew. He can and He will. He did it for me.

Last Night...

... was an extremely peaceful night for me. I came home from work looked at some jobs online, and then went upstairs, showered, ate, and twisted my hair back. I had "The Original Quiet Storm on 96.3" playing in the background. My lights were dim, but not too dark for me to function. It was really nice.

Listening to all of those songs got me to thinking about love and how easy it used to be. When did it become hard? When did it become about what other people thought? When did it become about everyone else's feelings? What about the feelings of the two people involved? It used to be so easy....

Anywho... I have to make me a CD. Those songs hit the spot! Some were oldies and some I had never heard before. But of course, today, if you're not talking about money, sex, or women with Lil Wayne and T-Pain on the track, then your music will never get heard by the mainstream. You have to wait patiently for "The Original Quiet Storm on 96.3" (And you have to say it with a deep sensual voice like the guy does. hehe....) to come on.

India Arie has this song called "Good Mourning". It woke me up out of my sleep. (Yes, I fell asleep with the radio on). Her voice, the music- it was so beautiful! And on top of that, it seemed as though she was snooping in on my life when she wrote it. Why have I been sleeping on India?

And then "If Only For One Night" by Charles Earland & Najee. I love me some Najee. And that song- OH!!! I love it! I didn't know the song was 6 freaking years old?!?

And "No Rhyme, No Reason" by George Duke featuring Rachell Ferrell. That is a classic! Please, if you have never heard this song, go find it.

Bobby Caldwell- "What You Wont Do For Love" I've loved this song since I was a baby!

Frankie Beverly & Maze!! I could go on and on...

Anywho... It's cloudy outside. Just the way I like it. I'm still in my lazy, chilled out, mode. I wish I was at home, curled up on the couch doing absolutely nothing but listening to my smooth jazz/r&b and watching the candle's flicker.

*sigh*


"No Rhyme, No Reason"

Fro on the Grow!

April 21st- day after the BC

September 5th

I'm in a picture posting mood. I can't believe how much my hair has grown!!!! Keep on growing!!

Pic of the Day!

LOLOLOL!!!! AHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I love this pic! We were about to sing, and a different song came on. LOL!!! I won't say what song it was, but by the looks on our faces, it was NOTHING that would ever come out of our mouths.

I like to jump in pics! I can't help it!

Yen and Yang?? -------->

This is almost all of us. Tabby was taking the pic.

Friday Randoms

* I saw a giraffe bird this morning. No lie! I was driving and looked up and there was this thing sitting on a power line. It had a short, stumpy lower with this extremely long neck! A giraffe bird! Look it up!

* So, the song, Mary Jane, by Rick James- that wasn't about a woman named Mary Jane, was it? I was jamming this morning in my car to it and it dawned on me. Where have I been???

* I'm in such a wonderful mood. I'm alive! I'm blessed! I'm a winner!! =) Shout out to HLCC.

* I'm going to be 26 in 4 months. What the h-e double hockey sticks?!?! Where is the time going?? OMG!!!!

* I miss you. Let's go find something stupid to watch and fall out laughing together. How about the play???

* I let my soul sisters hold my Kinky Curly. I finally got it back and went to use it this morning and that bad boy was empty! Really guys????

* If McCain and Palin get elected, we can rest assured because he was in a war and she knows how to hunt. WOO HOO!!! That makes me feel secure living here in America.

*And what is so great that they are mavericks? What is that about? Please explain it to me. No seriously, someone email me or comment and tell me what that means.

* Why am I so disobedient?

*This guy that I work with embarrasses me when I come into work. He makes a big deal out of my beauty. lol. I'm not being conceited. I don't mean like that. But he says things out loud like: "Oh my goodness! (then turns to other co-workers) Do you see this? Do you see this? Who is this? I don't think we've met." or "Look at this super model right here." It's embarrassing. I don't want the whole office looking at me. Stop!

*Why do men think that we'll want them more if they let us know that other women are chasing after them? Please! I'm 25. Not 15. That is a turn off. If you feel the need to announce that then go ahead and play with the other women. I'm me. lol! I don't need a man to validate me. I don't need anyone who tries to make me feel anything other than fabulous. And I definitely don't compete with anyone! I'm a gem. A jewel. And if you can't see that, then you are not the one! Got it? Good.

You Want Control- 8.16.05

Oldie but goodie:

You Want Control
You just have to have the upper hand
You gotta be the bigger man
Even if it costs hurting me
Your lies are more important than the pain and grief
That you cause me when you play with my head
Tell me one thing and do another instead
You cant handle the fact that Ive moved on
Don't want me to call you on the phone
And ask for something that has nothing to do with you
Maybe assistance or a little help with the move
Is that the only reason you called? you ask
Why else should I be calling? I don't hide behind masks
Like you do, its so plain to see
Your youth, denial, and mediocrity
I don't have time for the games, though I did in the past
I wanna see you hurt, want it to happen fast
You reap what you sew is what they say
What goes around comes around, it'll happen one day
But I want what hes sewn to reap right now
I want the come around to come and don't know how
I can let go of this desire that I have of you
To see you down on your knees crawling in plain view
Of the world to see the agony that you caused me
Want you to beg for mercy, cry like a child
Give me praying hands while I laugh out loud
But knowing me, Ill only forgive
Give you one more chance and a day to live
And change the things you did to me
Make right the wrongs and erase the grief.

Enough

On the phone
We can talk about anything
So easy, so comfortable
That’s how I feel with you
I could lie in your arms
And listen to your heartbeat
I could kiss you for hours
No need for air
The breath you breathed
Was enough for me
But I was in too deep
That shouldn’t have been enough
Another man longed for that spot
And eventually I gave in
I left you alone
And now that the smoke has cleared
I see you
And I smile
I hear your voice
And I smile
I hear your laugh
And I smile
But it’s not enough
Can’t be enough
Obviously isn’t enough
Because if it was
You would be mine

Can't Believe It

I don't know how I heard this song. I think I was flipping stations in my car. The music caught my ear. So, I stopped and listened. Turns out its T-Pain. Go figure... The song is about how good this woman makes him feel.

She "makes the people say yeah."

Whatever that means.

He then says "I can't believe it. She all on me. I think she wants me." haha lol! That cracks me up because if I were him, I wouldn't believe it either. Ok. That was mean. I take that back. hehe....

Anywho...I love the music. Just give me the instrumental to ride out to. And of course Lil Wayne has to get on the song at the end. I didn't even listen to him. He was doing something funky with his voice, slurring his words, and talking nasty. Too much for me. I'm trying to go forward....

Music takes my mind to other places; places that I have no business revisiting. And,

for as he thinketh in his heart, so is he. Proverbs 23

So, I have to keep control over my mind. That is why I choose not to listen to certain secular songs. It's the music that gets me though. I heard that first note and I was hooked.

Always!

This song has been in rotation on 104.1- D.C.'s station for praise! hehe... And I had no clue who sang it. But it is my jam!! Me and my friend tear that song up when it comes on while we're riding in the car. So, I did a search. Couldn't find it. I then went to Yahoo! Answers and typed in the lyrics. And voila! I found it!

The song is called "Always" by Jason Champion. It has this funky beat to it. It's almost cheesy. lol! But I love it!!!!!! And he does that Zapp or T-Pain (for those who have no clue who Zapp is- and shame on you if you don't) thingy with his voice on the chorus. It isn't over kill. Just slightly. Anywho... that song makes me wanna dance with a huge smile on my face. It's just one of those cheesy happy songs that reminds you that "everything is gonna be ALRIGHT!"

Youtube only has a remix (that I don't like). However, his myspace page has a snippet of it.

Check it out: http://www.myspace.com/officialjasonchampion

You can also hear it on his album: Reflections

Recap! Sort of....

It's Tuesday! I had a wonderful weekend. My friend kidnapped me and I ended up spending the ENTIRE weekend with her. That was fun because it was the first time that we really hung out for real for real outside of church. I have tons of pics... so I can't write about my crazy weekend until I get the pics uploaded...... :(

And it all started Friday night. Friday night we stayed out until almost three in the morning. Then Saturday after the picnic, we went on an adventure (Maryland, D.C., VA) just to find a Whole Foods so that we could get some hair stuff. We passed about 50 Whole Foods along the way, but we could only go to this specific one because it was the only one that carried what we were looking for. The three of us ended up coming back to my place around 12 am. I then attempted to dye my hair (unsuccessful). Gigi (one of my soul sisters) left. Me and my other soul sister stayed at my place a little longer and then I ended up loading her car up and spending Saturday and Sunday night with her at her house. Fun times.... Pics coming soon....

oh yeah.. hehe.. Soul Sister is what we call one another because of our hair... cornballs- I know.