I'm A Work in Progress...

I don't understand why the events that have occurred in my life happened. Right now, I don't understand how something that two people mutually wanted to work not work. Did I give up too soon? But things went sour before there was even an "us".

As I pray, worship, and read my Bible, I see now that God is telling me to simply trust Him. I keep coming across Psalms that talk about the security of the godly. I've been asking God if I made the right choice. I've been asking God for His will to be done. And I really believe that He is telling me to trust Him. Don't fret. I am God. God has me where he wants me. I am in complete surrender to Him because no one else can help me. No one has the answers. I don't have the answer. My friends don't have the answers. Only God. So, I'm going to continue to seek Him, praise Him, worship Him, and read His word.

I see now that I got side tracked. I'm not saying that God is the reason that things went haywire, but I do know that God is a jealous God. And when He gets replaced by other things, He can and will remove them.

I need to get to a place where no matter what, I make time for Him. He has to be first in my life. When everything crumbles in my face, I immediately run back to Him. So, why not just keep Him first??? It's so simple, yet so hard for me.

I want God to bless me and give me those things that He has promised me. But I know he can't do that if He doesn't trust me with them. God wants us to understand that all that we have is from Him. Everything that I have and will have is from the Lord.

In my relationships God will be number one. In my house, God will be number one.

God isn't done with me yet. I'm really a work in progress. I've seen the good, bad, and the ugly come out of me. The ugly shocked the heck outta me because I thought I had gotten through it. But since I've been living for God, I hadn't been tested. Boy, did the test come!!! And man did I flunk it! And I see now that I have a lot of crap in me. I have a temper. I don't listen. I get easily offended and immediately go into defense mode. I see the error in me now. Yes, I have some problems. But that's OK. The fact that God woke me up this morning lets me know that He isn't finished with me. And for that, I am truly thankful.